I’m a proud Brit and a proud Englishman.

Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

Remember that you are an Englishman, and have consequently won first prize in the lottery of life.

The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck.

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

An Englishman, being flattered, is a lamb; threatened, a lion.

Truth is the most valuable thing we have. Let us economize it.

To Englishmen, life is a topic, not an activity.

When in doubt tell the truth.

Not only England, but every Englishman is an island.

Optimist: day dreamer more elegantly spelled.

I’m an Englishman. What more can I say?

Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident.

I am going to have a cup of tea, like any good Englishman.

An Englishman’s car is his castle on wheels.